Thursday, November 4, 2010

Reason #4,342 Why My Wife is Hotter than Yours

The wife is recreating The Cask of Amontillado on The Sims 3. Damn, that's hot.

She's made evil versions of us -- with long black hair, unnaturally thin and/or bosomy proportions, and several dead cows worth of black leather. Basically, Evil Jeremy and Evil The Wife look how the average Goth imagines they look, instead of the actual horrible, amusing truth.

Each time a sim stops by to greet their new evil neighbors, the Ivels, Evil Jeremy, the charismatic one (of course), will lead them into their imposing manor, amuse and regale them, and loll them into a false sense of security. Then, at the witching hour, he will escort them down to the basement, a carefully laid out and aesthetically pleasing (after all, even evil Sims need to maintain their happiness levels) chamber of horrors.

I assume the wife will start with the traditional horrors found in Poe's story, but from there...

Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of physicists on a sugar high from leftover Halloween candy?

I don't. But damn, it's hot...

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